A Warning to the Weary

 Today I am sitting on my back porch writing.  It’s been awhile, but now that I’m here, I just don’t want to leave.  I realize how badly I have needed this – just to sit and reflect for a little while –no bible studying (even though that’s important), no ministry stuff (even though that good), not even much praying going on, other than a few thoughts that come to mind (even though that vital).  I’ve just been sitting here and allowing God to reassure me that He’s here too - with me. 

  We are in a very busy season of life right now, especially in our ministry and at the same time, in our personal life, my husband has been battling a very serious illness.  I will be the first to admit I haven’t been juggling well.  

 I am so very tired.  

 It’s a tired that goes beyond needing sleep, or more caffeine or even a few days off.  I’ve tried all of the above. It is beyond the physical- my spirit is tired. 

  

 Ever been there?

If you not shouting an Amen right now, let me give you a few warning signs that seem to creep up from nowhere when you are spiritually tired:

1. You feel overwhelmed with the responsibilities of life
2. You find yourself angry with other people for not “working” as much as you are.
3. You find yourself battling feelings of depression/anxiety whenever you are not concentrating on your work/ministry.
4. You feel taken advantage of by those you are serving/working for.
5. You feel alone and unloved, even when surround by people who love you.

Scary stuff when you see it in writing, huh?

 These are just a few – I’m sure there are more. I once read of weary Pastor who said he knew he was in trouble when he found himself reading the obituaries and envying the people he was reading about.

 Spiritual weariness is dangerous ground – it’s a warning, my friend.  It’s time to stop for a moment and consider what your spirit is missing, choked out by the circumstances of life.

  I don’t know exactly where this post is headed-to be honest- I never do, but I think I feel a series coming on here.  Please don’t take this as professional advice – I am just a pastor’s wife sharing my experiences and what I’ve learned from them.  And I am praying that if you are walking where I am, you will find encouragement here as we walk together.  We need each other, especially when we feel like that last thing we want to do is put any effort into another relationship.  You are not alone and God never meant for you to walk this journey alone.  Recently, God has placed beautiful ladies in my path that could relate exactly to my experiences, some of them Pastors wives who are walking or have walked in the same places I seem to find myself walking.  They have not condemned me for honestly sharing my feelings – that were not exactly spiritual.  They offered me encouragement, support, and understanding. It’s nice to be assured that you’re not crazy sometimes, even while you are having a very public emotional breakdown in the middle of Panera Bread Co! (You know who you are and I love you!!)

  So, over the next few posts, I will share what God’s been showing me through this place, the good, the not so good, and the just plain ugly of it too. If you find yourself on this same path, I would love for you to join me…feel free to share your comments. Let’s walk this journey together.     

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