I felt a cold sweat
sweep over me as she walked through the doors of the church. How long had it been – five, maybe six
years? Yet, still at the very sight of
her, the sting of her offense radiated through me. Why was she here? Had she come to gloat and bring back all the
hurt she had once been a part of. All
through service, I was on edge, pleading with God to just let me get though it,
so I could go home and lick my old wounds that had now been reopened. We had almost made it out the door when she stopped
and asked to speak with us. I crumbled
inside, while trying to keep an open composure as we sat down together.
Then she began to cry.
As the tears ran
down her face, she confessed all that we knew she had done and some things that
we weren’t even aware of. She asked us to forgive her.
My heart sank.
I thought that I
had, but judging from my attitude at her presence, it was apparent that I had
not. It was very easy to bury the
hurtful memories away and move on. I told myself that moving on meant that I
had forgiven. However, what I felt at
the moment she entered the room was anything but forgiveness.
Forgiveness is important because Jesus taught that we would
not be forgiven unless we forgive. I
know I should. I want to. But HOW do we
forgive? How do you tread though the
ocean of hurt you are drowning in and make your way to the shore of
forgiveness?
Matthew 18:21-22 (KJV)
21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?
22 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.
21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?
22 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.
Forgiveness is a verb, not an emotion. We choose to forgive. Everyday we must choose to walk in
forgiveness eventually, feelings will follow, but first it must be a
choice. When asked how many times we
are to forgive, Jesus said we are to choose to forgive 70x7. He knew that forgiveness would take time.
That it would be a daily process, so he encouraged us not to give up but to
keep choosing daily to walk in forgiveness. How many times will it take until
your feelings follow –who knows? But I
bet you won’t get to 490 days.
In Matthew 5:44 there are three instructions given that help
you know you are walking in forgiveness.
Matthew 5:44 (KJV)
44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
Love your
enemies-
Seems like an
impossible thing to do. How do you feel
love for someone that hurts you and wouldn’t loving them be like saying
whatever they did was not wrong? The
love spoken of here is not the same kind of love that comes naturally. It’s not the same love you feel for your
children or someone who loves you back.
Without getting too deep, it is simply a benevolent love - a love that
is decidedly given. It is a love that
is given by which we wish well for a person, but cannot approve of their
conduct. It is a love that causes us to
have compassion for their weaknesses.
It is love that causes us to speak kindly of them and to them and to
return good for evil as Romans 2:17 reminds us to do.
Bless them that
curse you –
The word bless here
means “to speak well of” or “speak well to” -Vine’s Expository Dictionary. We speak only of those things that we can
commend in them. If there’s nothing
that we can commend, then we speak nothing about them at all.
Pray for them that despitefully use you –
Translated this
means those that injure you, unjustly accuse you, pursue or follow after you
and oppress. Hmm, how and what do you
pray for someone like that? I can think
of some prayers that I would like to pray but they wouldn’t necessarily fall
into line with loving and blessing! If
I’m honest, I admit that I have found myself pleading with God to bring
justice and then pleading with God to have mercy on those that I know have been
disobedient because I know that God is just. I am conflicted. Why? Because I am concerned with what
doesn’t concern me. I must let go and
leave room for God to do what He will do.
I must do what He wants me to do.
Pray for them with a heart that understands that God wants to use them
(what they have done) to do something new in me. As I allow these things to mold me into what He wants me to be,
I can accept all that has been and I can pray this prayer:
Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even
I bless them and do not curse them.
Enemies have driven me into your embrace more than friends have.
Enemies have loosed me from earth more than friends have…
Enemies have made me a hunted animal, finding safer shelter than an unhunted animal does.
Enemies have driven me into your embrace more than friends have.
Enemies have loosed me from earth more than friends have…
Enemies have made me a hunted animal, finding safer shelter than an unhunted animal does.
I found safest sanctuary in
You…may too my enemies-made-grace.
I found greatest grace in You… may my enemies-made-grace find Your generous grace alive and radical in me.
I found fullest forgiveness in You… may my enemies-made-grace find faith and freedom in You and Your forgiveness working surprising ways in me.
I found greatest grace in You… may my enemies-made-grace find Your generous grace alive and radical in me.
I found fullest forgiveness in You… may my enemies-made-grace find faith and freedom in You and Your forgiveness working surprising ways in me.
The longer I walk with you,
Lord, I find I have no enemies: only your gift of chisels etching me
deep.
Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless them and do not curse them.
Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless them and do not curse them.
